Dazed

We used to do a skit on retreat where people representing sins would circle around a girl and run around her creating a climactic whirlwind. I feel like I'm enveloped in something like that right now. Not necessarily trapped by sin, but I feel like I am in the center of a whirlwind of factors: school, work, ministry, clubs, friends, family and just trying to get some alone time for myself. I don't think I have enough hours in a day. In this whirlwind I feel like I'm losing focus, getting worn out, dazed and confused. On top of that is the myriad of options that face me after I graduate..."What are you going to do after you graduate?" I hear this question almost every week now either from my parents, friends, co-workers or random people that I meet when they find out I'm a fourth year. I DON'T KNOW! I have so many plans, doors opening for me, people pushing and pulling me in several directions...discernment is necessary.
On top of that, insecurities creep up on me every now and then...yes I do have them. Lately, some insecurities have been getting at me..slowly eating away at me. I fight them off, but they become nuisances and when I'm tired they can be killer. It's mainly about some the quality of my life these past years, my capabilities, etc. I really need sleep. I need rest...no time for it though.
On a lighter note, I've had to take the place of the receptionist at work since she's been out sick for the past 3 weeks. She claims to have Bronchitis, but the other day an agent told me she was really at a fat camp and had already lost 75 pounds. I laughed first thinking he was joking, but he seemed pretty serious. I don't know if its true or not. I just don't want to be receptionist anymore. BLAH!